Bubba Smith in “Police Academy”

Bubba Smith was such a beast on the football field that Baltimore Colts fan Ogden Nash was moved to write:

He’s like a hoodoo, like a hex, 
He’s like Tyrannosaurus Rex.

He also appeared in six Police Academy movies, Bubba did, as Cadet/Sergeant/Captain Moses Hightower.  (How could anyone deny a 6-7, 265-pound, quarterback-munching defensive end a promotion?) One memorable scene:

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Sports medicine in the ’30s

The Giants’ first general manager, Dr. Harry A. March, was an actual medical doctor (and formerly the medical examiner in Canton, Ohio). Naturally, he had more than a passing concern for the players’ health. He even endorsed a miracle product he claimed was “excellent for football bruises and cuts” and — as if that weren’t enough — the best remedy for athlete’s foot. The newspaper ad:

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The incredible shrinking running back

Much was made during the offseason about the running back’s diminished importance in today’s pass-first offenses. For the second year in a row — an NFL first — no runner was taken in Round 1 of the draft. So I thought I’d work up some charts that showed exactly why.

As you can see below, 10 of the 14 Super Bowl winners in the 2000s have had a quarterback who ranked in the Top 10 in the league in passer rating, but only three have had a back that ranked in the Top 10 in rushing (one of them being the Seahawks’ Marshawn Lynch last year).

For that matter, just four of the champs had a Top 10 receiver, and five of them (including Seattle) didn’t even have a 1,000-yard guy. It’s more about Spreading the Ball Around now. (So how come nobody’s talking about the Incredible Shrinking Wideout?)

It wasn’t like this in the early years of the free agency (1993-99). Elite runners and elite receivers were very much a part of winning titles. Five of the seven championship clubs had Top 10 rushers and just as many had Top 10 pass-catchers. The specifics:

Year Champion QB, Rating (Rank) Top Rusher, Yds (Rank) Top Receiver, Yds (Rank)
2013 Seahawks Russell Wilson, 101.2 (7) Marshawn Lynch, 1,257 (6) Golden Tate, 898 (31)
2012 Ravens Joe Flacco, 87.7 (14) Ray Rice, 1,143 (11) Anquan Boldin, 921 (27)
2011 Giants Eli Manning, 92.9 (7) Ahmad Bradshaw, 659 (29) Victor Cruz, 1,536 (3)
2010 Packers Aaron Rodgers, 101.2 (3) Brandon Jackson, 703 (33) Greg Jennings, 1,265 (4)
2009 Saints Drew Brees, 109.6 (1) Pierre Thomas, 793 (T24) Marques Colston, 1,074 (18)
2008 Steelers B.Roethlisberger, 80.1 (24) Willie Parker, 791 (26) Hines Ward, 1,043 (15)
2007 Giants Eli Manning, 73.9 (25) B. Jacobs, 1,009 (T15) Plaxico Burress, 1,025 (21)
2006 Colts P. Manning, 101.0 (1) Joseph Addai, 1,081 (18) Marvin Harrison, 1,366 (2)
2005 Steelers B.Roethlisberger, 98.6 (3) Willie Parker, 1,202 (12) Hines Ward, 975 (22)
2004 Patriots Tom Brady, 92.9 (9) Corey Dillon, 1,635 (3) David Givens, 874 (32)
2003 Patriots Tom Brady, 85.9 (10) Antowain Smith, 642 (30) Deion Branch, 803 (32)
2002 Bucs Brad Johnson, 92.9 (3) Michael Pittman, 718 (32) K. Johnson, 1,088 (16)
2001 Patriots Tom Brady, 86.5 (6) Antowain Smith, 1,157 (12) Troy Brown, 1,199 (10)
2000 Ravens Trent Dilfer, 76.6 (21) Jamal Lewis, 1,364 (7) Shannon Sharpe, 810 (32)

Now look at the 1993-to-1999 period:

Year Champion QB, Rating (Rank) Top Rusher, Yards (Rank) Top Receiver, Yards (Rank)
1999 Rams Kurt Warner, 109.2 (1) Marshall Faulk, 1,381 (5) Isaac Bruce, 1,165 (12)
1998 Broncos John Elway, 93.0 (5) Terrell Davis, 2,008 (1) Rod Smith, 1,222 (4)
1997 Broncos John Elway, 87.5 (7) Terrell Davis, 1,750 (2) Rod Smith, 1,180 (T8)
1996 Packers Brett Favre, 95.8 (2) Edgar Bennett, 899 (14) Antonio Freeman, 933 (24)
1995 Cowboys Troy Aikman, 93.6 (3) Emmitt Smith, 1,773 (1) Michael Irvin, 1,603 (4)
1994 49ers Steve Young, 112.8 (1) Ricky Watters, 877 (15) Jerry Rice, 1,499 (1)
1993 Cowboys Troy Aikman, 99.0 (2) Emmitt Smith, 1,486 (1) Michael Irvin, 1,330 (2)

This gives us the following breakdown:

Period (Seasons) Top 10 QBs Top 10 RBs Top 10 Receivers
2000-13 (14) 10 3 4
1993-99 (7) 7 5 5

Another indication of the position’s decline: None of the Top 10 postseasons by a Super Bowl-winning running back have come in this century. The party pretty much ended with the Broncos’ Terrell Davis in 1997 and ’98.

Year RB, Team Games Yards Per Game
1998 Terrell Davis, Broncos 3 468 156.0
1983 Marcus Allen, Raiders 3 466 155.3
1982 John Riggins, Redskins 4 610 152.5
1997 Terrell Davis, Broncos 4 581 145.3
1974 Franco Harris, Steelers 3 343 114.3
1987 Timmy Smith, Redskins 3 342 114.0
1992 Emmitt Smith, Cowboys 3 336 112.0
1973 Larry Csonka, Dolphins 3 333 111.0
1975 Franco Harris, Steelers 3 314 104.7
1986 Joe Morris, Giants 3 313 104.3

Top three postseasons by running backs on Super Bowl losers: Thurman Thomas with the 1990 Bills (3/309/130), Frank Gore with the 2012 49ers (3/319/106.3) and Marshall Faulk with the 2001 Rams (3/317/105.7).

Sources: pro-football-reference.com, nfl.com

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Red Smith’s strange ideas about football

Though he was born and raised in Green Bay — about a mile from where Curly Lambeau lived for a while — Red Smith wasn’t what you’d call a Football Guy. The famed sportswriter grew up, after all, in a baseball world. It wasn’t until the early ’70s, when he was almost 70, that the NFL became No. 1 in America’s heart.

Maybe that explains the cockamamie notions he floated in a 1958 column for the New York Herald Tribune. He attributed the first to a reader, one Robert L. Talbot of Summit, N.J., who claimed to be a “spokesman of a group of fans.” Talbot wrote:

“Whenever a team is behind by more than seven points it should be entitled to receive the kickoff regardless of which team has scored. [Say a] team that has been behind, 30 to 13, makes the score 30 to 20. This team still trails by seven points and so is entitled to receive the next kickoff.

“Another touchdown would make the score 30 to 27. With only a three-point difference, present rules would apply and the team scored against would elect to receive. We believe this would sustain interest at a higher pitch right up to the end.”

College all-star games used to have a rule like that, in case the score got too one-sided. (Perhaps they still do. I stopped watching them years ago.) Anyway, this Talbot fellow wanted to turn pro football into the North-South game — and Red was all for it!

“[T]his is no reckless, half-baked device to louse up established practice and open the gate for wild scoring,” he wrote. “The privilege of receiving the kickoff is no guarantee that a score will result, and there is a safety factor in the provision requiring an eight-point difference in scores (or a nine-point difference in college, probably) before the old order changeth. . . .

“The feeling here is that Mr. Talbot’s proposal is worth a trial. Chances are it would have little effect on the outcome of games. Certainly it would never enable a poor team to beat a good team. Yet if it helped at all to narrow the point spread between poorly matched teams, if it kept alive the possibility of a laggard catching up, it would serve its purpose.”

I’m just gonna let that argument speak for itself — and move on to Red’s second bout of temporary insanity: eliminating the clock and having games limited to a proscribed number of plays. His logic:

There is no good reason why a football game should end after 60 minutes of timed action and inaction. A championship fight goes 15 rounds. A golf match is 18 or 36 holes. Some games like soccer or hockey or basketball or polo must be clocked because there’s no other way of measuring them.

This isn’t so of football. On five minutes’ notice, statisticians could come up with figures showing how many plays a pair of live teams ought to run in any game or in any quarter of a game. There is no reason at all why a game couldn’t be measured by so many plays a quarter, rather than so many minutes.

There would then be no more of this nonsense about stopping the clock or running out the clock. Then the dial over the scoreboard would show not how much time remained but how many plays remained. Strategy wouldn’t change much, but a lot of sharp practice would be eliminated.

Yes, Red, let’s make football more like baseball, The Game That Has No Clock. All I can say is, it must have been one heck of a slow day in the Herald Trib sports department.

I don’t want anyone thinking I hold Red in low esteem. On the contrary, almost an entire bookshelf in my study is taken up with his collections. I just found this particular column hysterical. He did plenty of terrific football writing, too, like this passage on the Ice Bowl between the Packers and Cowboys:

It was the coldest Dec. 31 in the Green Bay records – 13 below zero at kickoff with a perishing wind carrying misery out of the northwest at 15 miles an hour. In spite of the 14 miles of electric heating cable under the turf, Lambeau Field froze, though not too hard for cleats. On the sidelines, players huddled under canvas hogans warmed by electric heaters, but out on the field there was no mercy.

No penguin is Bart Starr, of Montgomery, Ala. Fleeing from the rush of [Willie] Townes and [George] Andrie, he was harried back to his 7-yard line, where Townes jarred the ball out of his stiffened fingers. Andrie scooped it up and the score was 14-7.

No polar bear is Willie Wood. On a Dallas punt, he fumbled a fair catch and the Cowboys’ Phil Clark recovered on the Green Bay 17 [which led to a field goal].

Another of his dispatches on the game carried this dateline:

GREEN BAY, Wis. (BY SLED DOG) –

Finally, here he is in 1965 on the violence issue — specifically as it pertained to quarterbacks:

The mug shots of all professional quarterbacks should be displayed in the post office under the caption: “Wanted — Dead or Alive.” If John Dillinger were around today, he would be wearing jersey No. 19 like Johnny Unitas or 15 like . . . Bart Starr or 12 like Charley Johnson.

It isn’t pro football any longer. The name of the game now is get the quarterback. If [commissioner] Pete Rozelle had J. Edgar Hoover’s job, there would be 14 names — one from each team in the National [Football] League — on the FBI’s list of the 10 most wanted criminals.

It is shocking, but it is legal under the rules and probably nothing can be done about it without emasculating the game. . . . The pros have come as close as sweaty ingenuity can come to reducing an 11-man game to a game for two — the passer and the receiver. This makes the quarterback as important as the pitcher in baseball. It also makes him a prime target of ungentle monsters whose aim is to win and who know the shortest route to victory is straight over his cadaver.

Beautiful.

But pro football clearly wasn’t Red’s favorite sport — and he didn’t try to hide it. In 1960 he referred to it as “the high-scoring game of beanbag that masquerades as football in the pro leagues.”

Well, if that’s the way you feel about it . . .

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Before the fall: Jim Dent’s regrettable book on Bronko Nagurski

Around the time his book on Bronko Nagurski was published in 2003, Jim Dent was sent to prison for violating his probation stemming from a felony drunk-driving conviction. Had anyone at his publishing house bothered to read the manuscript closely — line by line, “fact” by “fact” — it would have been clear that Dent was in rough shape, and that maybe Monster of the Midway should have been put in a drawer for a while until Jim (hopefully) got his life sorted out.

Alas, that didn’t happen. And so we’re left with a work that, in places, might be more fiction than non-fiction. I’ll lay out the evidence. You be the judge.

Before I go any further, let me just say that when I first heard Dent, author of the bestselling Junction Boys, was coming out with a book about the Bears’ famed fullback, I couldn’t wait to get my hands on it. Not nearly enough has been written about pro football’s early days, and Nagurski, of course, is legendary, arguably the greatest player in the single-platoon era.

But there was more to it than that. I was dying to see how Dent dealt with the obstacles I’d faced over the years — sparse newspaper coverage, precious few surviving game films and an increasing lack of eyewitnesses. The prewar period was vanishing fast. How did he manage to overcome that? Had he unearthed some sources I hadn’t?

The first time I cracked open Monster of the Midway, I found it a breezy read. Almost immediately, though, I wondered about the liberties Dent took in imagining conversations between Bronko, Bears owner-coach George Halas and others he couldn’t possibly have interviewed (unless it was via séance).

My eyebrows really went up when Dent wrote that in the first round of the 1939 draft, the Bears chose “a little-known tailback from Columbia named Sid Luckman.” Luckman was actually one of the most celebrated college players in the country. In November of his senior year, his dirt-smeared face had appeared on the cover of Life magazine, which had a huge circulation. He’d also finished third in the Heisman Trophy balloting, despite playing for a team that won just three games. Had the Bears not taken him with the second pick, his hometown Brooklyn Dodgers surely would have grabbed him at No. 5.

It wasn’t until recently, though, when I returned to the book to reread the section about the 1937 championship game, that I realized something disturbing: There are major discrepancies between Dent’s play-by-play and the one that ran the next day in The Washington Post. At some points, they seem like two different games.

Dent’s version: “Jack Manders’s opening kickoff was a line drive that slipped through the fingers of Cliff Battles and bounded between the legs of Ernie Pinckert. It was finally fielded by Max Krause at the one-yard line, where he was smothered by a pack of Bears.”

The Post’s version: “The toss was won by the Redskins and Captain Turk Edwards chose to kick off with the wind at his back. Nagurski took the ball on his own 1-yard line, slipped and fell, regained his feet and returned the kick to his 33, where Baugh bumped him out of bounds.”

But, hey, don’t take the Post‘s word for it. Check out this newsreel clip (that, in the pre-television age, was shown in movie theaters throughout the U.S.). For starters, it says, “Redskins kick off.” And yes, that’s Bronko fielding the ball, slipping on the frozen turf and returning to the 33.

According to the Post, Washington’s first possession came after “[Ray] Nolting punted outside” — that is, out of bounds — “on the Redskins’ 7-yard line.”

So there was no line-drive kickoff by Manders to start the game, no ball that glanced off Battles’ hands, bounced through Pinckert’s legs and was scooped up by Krause, who was tackled dangerously close to the goal line. That’s all . . . dramatization? Hallucination? The product of fuzzy memories? You tell me.

It matters for lots of reasons, not the least being that a famous play followed, one that saw Sammy Baugh line up in punt formation in the Washington end zone and surprise the Bears with a screen pass to Battles — at a time when screens were rare if not unheard of. The play gained 43 yards and started the Redskins on their way to a 28-21 upset victory. The play also foreshadowed what was to come in pro football: increasingly wide-open offenses that would throw the ball anytime from anywhere.

Here’s the clip of the screen. Note: The line of scrimmage is the 7, not the 1 (as Dent claims).

The ’37 title game was a watershed game for the NFL. Baugh, a rookie, racked up 335 passing yards that frigid afternoon — 29 more than the regular-season record. It would be nice, to the extent we can, to get the details right. Unfortunately, the game Dent “recreates” drifts in and out of reality.

After the Redskins took a 7-0 lead, he says, “The Bears responded in typical fashion. Nagurski carried the ball six straight times, all the way to the Washington 40-yard line. Then he tore through a large hole opened by Musso. One man stood in his path, and he was wearing No. 33. Nagurski lowered his shoulder and exploded into the rail-thin Baugh, sending him head over heels. The trainers came running out with smelling salts.”

The Post: “Edwards kicked off to Nolting, who ran the ball 20 yards to the Bears’ 28. Nolting made 2 yards at right end before Riley Smith nailed him. Justice replaced Pinckert in the Redskin backfield. Masterson passed to Manske, who made a shoestring catch in Baugh’s [safety] territory, slipped on the Redskins’ 40, regained [his footing] and ran to the Redskins’ 19 before Baugh brought him down. Nagurski swept around left end for 9 yards before Baugh bumped him down. Manders shot through a huge hole at right guard for 10 yards and a touchdown.”

Anybody notice Nagurski carrying the ball “six straight times”? Neither did I. The final statistics credit him with just eight rushing attempts total — three in the first quarter, four in the third and the last in the fourth (going by the Post‘s detailed account). Only once did he carry on back-to-back plays, never mind six in a row.

We move ahead to the third quarter:

Dent: “After the kickoff was returned to the 22-yard line, Baugh lofted a rainbow for [Wayne] Millner, who was 10 yards behind the Bears secondary and off to the races. The score was tied again [21-21].”

I ask you: Does it look in the following clip like Millner was open by 10 yards — or two?

Dent: “All eyes were on Millner as the Redskins drove deeper and deeper into Chicago territory late in the third quarter. Baugh jumped high in the air and pump-faked to Millner. With his feet back on the ground, Baugh pivoted and fired to a wide-open Ed ‘Chug’ Justice in the left corner of the end zone. The Redskins led 28-21.”

As you’ll see, Baugh didn’t jump “high in the air” when he pump faked before tossing the game-winning 35-yard TD pass to Justice. You’ll also see that, far from grabbing the ball in the “left corner of the end zone,” Justice caught it at the Chicago 18, in the general vicinity of the right hashmark, and ran it in from there.

Dent’s narrative, in other words, reads more like one of those Hollywood screenplays that’s “based on a true story.” He even dreams up this dramatic finish: “With only seconds remaining,” the Bears might have scored if receiver Les McDonald “hadn’t become tangled with back judge Ed Cochrane” on a 39-yard gain to the Washington 12. “By the time McDonald freed himself of Cochrane, Battles and Baugh were rushing up from behind. They caught McDonald just as the final gun sounded.”

This passage sets off all kinds of alarms, reeks of Too Good To Be True-ness. Not surprisingly, the Post, Chicago Tribune and New York Times — all of whom covered the game extensively — make no mention of McDonald’s run-in with the official. Seems like at least one of them would have.

Beyond that, though, this wasn’t the Bears’ last gasp. They ran four more plays in that series (two runs, a sack and an incomplete pass), lost the ball on downs, got it back again at their 42 and attempted two more passes, the second of which was intercepted. The Post’s play-by-play has the ball being snapped 16 times after the pass to McDonald — six by the Bears. (And the Bears would have had more chances, presumably, if they hadn’t fumbled a punt a short time later and enabled the Redskins to keep possession a while longer.)

It’s enough to make you question just about anything Dent says — with good reason, perhaps. Two more head-scratchers from earlier in the book:

Dent: “On October 4, Nagurski came off the wrestling circuit and arrived at [Pittsburgh’s] Forbes Field about an hour before kickoff. He had yet to practice with the Bears all season.”

Not true. According to the newspapers, he joined them a week before their Sept. 19 opener at Green Bay and played in that game and a non-league charity game two days later in Duluth, his old stomping grounds. Then he went back to wrestling for a while.

Dent: “[Nagurski] carried 15 straight times on one drive [against Pittsburgh] that led to a touchdown pass from Bernie Masterson to Stinky Hewitt.”

Lord knows where the “15 straight times” comes from. The Chicago Tribune had Bronko down for 10 carries in the entire game. Also, the TD — the only score in the 7-0 Bears victory — came not on a pass but on a 13-yard run by Nolting. But here’s the best part: Bill “Stinky” Hewitt, Masterson’s alleged target, was no longer with the Bears. Halas had traded him to the Eagles before the season.

Have I made my point? Monster of the Midway never should have seen the light of day — not then, anyway. It was too turbulent a time for Dent. (I’m going to assume — and it may be ill-advised — that he hasn’t always been so fast and loose with the facts.) As the Dallas Observer reported the year the book came out:

Instead of traveling here and there for autograph sessions and meeting with interviewers eager to help boost sales of his latest book, . . . he’s awaiting word of which Texas prison unit he’ll soon be assigned to, wondering what manner of career might be left to him.

Then again, maybe Dent couldn’t be saved at that stage — by family, friend or publisher. He told the Observer in a phone call from jail: “I wasn’t ready to listen to anyone. I was too damn stubborn. I’ve been an alcoholic for years, one of those who had to hit rock bottom to wake up.”

The Observer also quoted him saying: “It hurts to know that I’ve got what I believe to be a really good new book out there that I can’t promote. Oh, I’ve done a few radio interviews, things like that, but mostly what people want to talk about isn’t Monster of the Midway but me getting ready to go to prison.”

A really good new book. Yikes.

Of course, one of his editors, Peter Wolverton at St. Martin’s Press, sang much the same song. “What Jim has done with Junction Boys and his subsequent books,” he said in the Observer piece, “is create a new genre of sports book, taking milestone historical events and the people who participated in them to a new level of quality.”

A new level of quality. His exhumation of The Great Bronko suggests otherwise.

In his hard-partying days, Dent had an “image as the Robert Downey Jr. of Texas sportswriters,” according to The Dallas Morning News. The actor, who plunged into a similar abyss (alcohol, prison, etc.), has made quite the comeback since confronting his demons over a decade ago. Dent seems intent on doing likewise. Paroled in 2005, he has cranked out five more books — the latest of which, Johnny Manziel’s Glory Run, will be released in September.

Can’t say I’ve read any of them yet. I’m still in recovery from Monster of the Midway. But they say time heals all wounds. . . .

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Helmetless in 1927

The clip below should be seen in its entirety. First because precious little game footage survives from the ’20s, and second because it’s only 2 minutes long. You got something better to do?

The teams are the Providence Steam Roller (dark jerseys) and the semipro Framingham (Mass.) Lion Tamers (light jerseys with stripes on the arms). The year is 1927 — the year before the Steam Roller won the NFL title and five years before they dropped out of the league, a victim of the Depression. It looks like the game is being played in Framingham, because Providence’s stadium, the Cycledrome, was built for bicycle racing and had a banked track running around the field.

One of the first things you notice (:03) is that the left end and right guard for Providence are bareheaded. I’m guessing the end, No. 12, is Ed Lynch. Not sure about the right guard, but it could be Jim Laird. Later on (:53) you’ll see Nos. 12 and 26, both helmetless, in the same frame, and later still (1:29), if you look hard, you’ll see three Steam Roller linemen without headgear — the left end, right guard and right end. The right end might be John Spellman, who was renowned as a wrestler and won a gold medal in the 1924 Paris Games — the Chariots of Fire Olympics — in the light-heavyweight class.

Also worthy of note:

● The officials are wearing white — like hospital attendants, which was probably fitting. It was a rough game back then, what with minimal padding, no facemasks (except to protect an injury) and, for some guys, no helmets.

● On the extra point (:26), the kicker uses a holder. It’s a good reminder that not everybody dropkicked in 1927. Indeed, by the end of the decade, the practice was becoming obsolete.

The Steam Roller’s coach was Hall of Famer Jimmy Conzelman, who also played quarterback for them. (The QB was essentially the blocking back in the single wing, though he often called the plays and, in Conzelman’s case, contributed as a receiver.) Jimmy was a legendary storyteller, and one of his best tales was about Lynch. It went something like this:

You hear a lot about Cal Hubbard and George Trafton from those early years, but you never hear about a lad named Ed Lynch. Lynch was a bricklayer before he went to college, and from what I’ve been able to learn, he was a very good man on the corners. Now, there are bricklayers and there are bricklayers. Some are good on a straightaway wall, but only a master craftsman can handle the delicate job of laying the corners. As I said, Lynch was very good on the corners.

When he’d gathered together enough money, he matriculated at Catholic University in Washington, D.C. He’s a legend down there now. He was a grand basketball player and a magnificent man on a football field. Six feet tall, about 205 pounds, wide shoulders, tremendous arms – an eye-filling sight from head to toe.

He played end for me in Detroit and Providence, and he was one of the finest ends I ever saw. He thought that only sissies wore pads, so he played without any protective equipment except the muscles he was born with. Brother, that was plenty.

One day we were playing the Frankford Yellow Jackets, and we returned the opening kickoff to about our 20. The Yellow Jackets had just signed a hotshot college tackle, and Lynch looked him over as we lined up for the first play.

“What’s your name, sonny?” asked Lynch, calm as you please.

The kid was taken aback by such a question at such a time. “Weir,” he said. “Ed Weir.”

“Oh,” answered Lynch, “you’re that All-America tackle from Nebraska. Gosh, it must be great to be famous. Take me, for instance. Nobody ever heard of me. I went to a little school, Catholic U., but I’m just as big as you and just as tough. I probably know more about football than you do, too. Give me a minute and I’ll show you.”

He turned back to me and said, “Jimmy, run a play around my end. I want to demonstrate something to this young fellow.” Nobody ever said that Conzelman was anything but obliging. So I carried the ball myself, and Lynch practically drove Weir into the next lot. A defensive back made the tackle about 20 yards downfield. As I walked back, there was Lynch helping Weir to his feet.

He was very nice about it, too. “See what I mean, sonny?” he remarked in kindly fashion. “Now let me show you again. Jimmy, run one this way once more.” And he pinned Weir in that same deadly fashion. What I wouldn’t have given to have a Lynch or two on my Chicago Cardinals teams in the ’40s. A great player. And a great bricklayer. Very good on the corners.

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Meyer Luckman’s file card at Sing Sing prison

Sid Luckman, the Bears’ Hall of Fame quarterback, was a senior at Brooklyn’s Erasmus Hall High when his father Meyer was arrested for murder in 1934. His dad wound up spending the last eight years of his life in Sing Sing prison, and never saw Sid play at Columbia or in the NFL. It was one of the great unwritten sports stories of the ’40s.

Somebody at the New York Department of Corrections was good enough to send me a copy of Meyer’s Sing Sing file card. As you can see, he was serving a 20-years-to-life sentence for Murder 2, and was eligible for parole March 6, 1949 — Sid’s next-to-last season. His heart gave out, though, in January 1944.

One last thing: His “S.S.#” — 91674 — obviously isn’t his Social Security number; there aren’t enough digits. It must be his Sing Sing number. Lucky Luciano, who was at the prison at the same time, was number 92163.

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James Wilder’s unbreakable(?) record

Thirty years is a long time for an NFL record to last. Eric Dickerson’s season rushing record of 2,105 yards, for instance, will turn 30 in 2014 — if the fates and Adrian Peterson permit it. (Though some might say O.J. Simpson’s 2,003 yards in 14 games in 1973, a 143.1-yard average, is a greater feat than Dickerson’s 131.6-yard average in 16 games.)

But that’s a blog for another day. The blog for this day is that Dickerson’s record, which has survived challenges from the likes of AP (2,097), Jamal Lewis (2,066), Barry Sanders (2,053), Terrell Davis (2,008) and Chris Johnson (2,006) in the past two decades, might not have as much staying power as another, less celebrated mark set in 1984: James Wilder’s 492 touches for the Bucs.

Many fans probably feel about touches the way Paul Reiser’s character felt about “nuance” in Diner: It’s not really a Football Word, not like block or tackle or sack. It’s a tad too, well, touchy-feely.

What 492 touches — in this case, 407 rushes and 85 receptions — reflect as much as anything is endurance, the ability to just take it. You’d think that would make the mark revered, this being a tough-guy game and all. But I get the feeling it’s thought of in the same vein as Joey Chestnut scarfing down 69 hot dogs at Coney Island. You just never hear football people talk about it.

Wilder did a lot with those touches, too. He finished third in the league in rushing (1,544), second in yards from scrimmage (2,229, the third-highest total in NFL history up to then) and second among running backs in receiving yards (685). It was, by any measure, a monster year. Unfortunately, his Tampa Bay team wasn’t very good — 6-10 — which helps explain, no doubt, why his accomplishment has been overlooked.

(He did have the benefit, though, of playing for John McKay, a coach who never worried much about putting mileage on his backs. McKay liked to joke that “the ball’s not heavy” — leaving out the fact that the defenders slamming into his ball carriers often were.)

To put Wilder’s season in perspective:

● His 492 touches broke Dickerson’s record, set the year before, by 51 — almost two games’ worth.

● He still holds the mark by 35.

● Only six quarterbacks that season had as many pass attempts as Wilder did touches — Dan Marino (564), Neil Lomax (560), Phil Simms (533), Steve DeBerg (509), Dan Fouts (507), Paul McDonald (493). (In pass-crazed 2013, 16 QBs did.)

Why does Wilder’s record endure — without anybody taking a serious run at it? For one thing, the game has changed. Teams run the ball less now and aren’t as likely to have one back carry as much of the load as James and his contemporaries did. Running Back by Committee is the preferred approach.

Beyond that, though, Wilder had the kind of year that virtually assured his mark would have legs — if not eternal life. Consider: His 407 rushes were an NFL record, and his 85 catches were second all time for a back. Here are the Top 5 in those departments through the ’84 season:

Year  Running back, team Rushes Year  Running back, team Catches
1984  James Wilder, Bucs 407 1978  Rickey Young, Vikings 88
1983  Eric Dickerson, Rams 390 1984  James Wilder, Bucs 85
1984  Walter Payton, Bears 384 1983  Ted Brown, Vikings 83
1984  Eric Dickerson, Rams 379 1980  Earl Cooper, 49ers 83
1981  George Rogers, Saints 378 1979  Joe Washington, Colts 82

Finally, a chart showing the Top 5 in touches before Wilder’s career year (left) and today:

Year  Running back, team Touches Year  Running back, team Touches
1983  Eric Dickerson, Rams 441 1984  James Wilder, Bucs 492
1979  Walter Payton, Bears 400 2006  Larry Johnson, Chiefs 457
1981  Earl Campbell, Oilers 397 2000  Eddie George, Titans 453
1981  George Rogers, Saints 394 2002  LaDainian Tomlinson, Chargers 451
1983  William Andrews, Falcons 390 2000  Edgerrin James, Colts 450

Three decades later, Wilder still has the third-most rushing attempts in a season, trailing only Johnson (416, 2006) and Jamal Anderson (410 with the ’98 Falcons). He’s also still in the Top 20 for receptions by a running back in a season (16th, with Larry Centers’ 101 for the ’95 Cardinals leading the way).

Thirty years from now, it’s entirely possible Wilder’s record will still be standing. Let’s just hope it’s a little more appreciated by then. It deserves to be.

Source: pro-football-reference.com

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The Patriots’ run

We all know how good the Patriots have been since Bill Belichick turned the quarterbacking over to Tom Brady in 2001: three championships, five Super Bowls, eight AFC title games. Enough for ya? And this is in an era, mind you, when such sustained excellence is supposed to be more difficult because of free-agent flight. It’s one of the best runs the NFL has seen.

But where exactly does it rank? Right near the top if you go by this chart. I looked at the best 13-year stretches in league history, based on won-loss record — figuring the championships would take care of themselves (which they mostly did). The Pats’ .752 winning percentage, playoffs included, is second only to the .772 compiled by the 1932-44 Bears, George Halas’ famed Monsters of the Midway.

Only one team on the list didn’t win multiple titles: the forever-falling-short 1967-79 Rams. Other than that, there should be few surprises.

Be advised: In some cases, a club was dominant for an even longer period and had more than one great 13-year run. The Cowboys, for example, were a machine from 1966 to ’85, with eight different 13-year stretches in which they won more than 70 percent of their games. In these overlapping instances, I took the best 13 years, reasoning that we were talking about many of the same players (and wanting to avoid duplication). Or to put it another way: only one to a customer.

Also, I’ve listed the most significant coaches and quarterbacks for each team, not every last one. (So, apologies to Tommy Prothro and Matt Cassel, among others.)

Some will say the championships are all that matter, and certainly they’re what matter most. But every week we hear a coach say “how hard it is to win a game” in the NFL. These clubs did that historically well.

THE COMPANY THE 2001-13 PATRIOTS KEEP

Seasons Team (Titles) Coaches Quarterbacks W-L-T Pct
1932-44 Bears (5) Jones/Halas Sid Luckman 116-30-12 .772
2001-13 Patriots (3) Bill Belichick Tom Brady 176-58-0 .752
1984-96 49ers (4) Walsh/Seifert Montana/Young 172-58-1 .747
1965-77 Raiders (1+1) Rauch/Madden Lamonica/Stabler 146-47-9 .745
1968-80 Cowboys (2) Tom Landry Roger Staubach 156-57-1 .731
1929-41 Packers (5) Curly Lambeau Herber/Isbell 116-42-6 .726
1958-70 Colts (3 + 1) Ewbank/Shula Unitas/Morrall 128-53-5 .702
1950-62 Browns (3) Paul Brown Otto Graham 115-49-5 .695
1967-79 Rams (0) Allen/Knox Roman Gabriel 136-58-7 .694
1972-84 Steelers (4) Chuck Noll Terry Bradshaw 145-65-1 .690

Note: the ’67 Raiders and ’68 Colts won the league championship but lost the Super Bowl. Thus the “+1.”)

Now . . . if you threw in the Browns’ four seasons in the All-America Conference, before they joined the NFL, you’d have to move them up to No. 1. From 1946 to ’58 they were 137-34-5, a .793 winning percentage. But that’s a judgment call. The AAC didn’t offer them much competition, as their 52-4-3 record in the league attests.

Finally, the Vince Lombardi Packers just missed making the list, topping out at .673 for their best 13 years (1960-72). Of course, during the nine seasons Vince coached them (1959-67) they were even better, posting a 98-30-4 record and a .758 winning percentage.

Sources: pro-football-reference.com, The Official NFL Record and Fact Book

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Putting a magnifying glass on Points Allowed

The fewer points an NFL team allows in a game, the better its chances to win, right? Not necessarily. And believe me, I’m as stunned by that revelation as you are.

Just out of curiosity one day, I went to my favorite research site, pro-football-reference.com, and started wearing out the Play Index. I wanted to know exactly how often a club won when it gave up a specific number of points. Not something nebulous like “17 or less,” but 2 points, 3 points . . . all the way up to 50. (For the record, nobody has won allowing more than 48 points.)

The results caught me off guard. In my statistical naiveté, I envisioned a steadily descending line graph from 2 to 50, but that’s not what I got at all. No, I got plenty of ups and downs, some of which could be attributed to small sample size — how often does a team allow 18 points? — but not all.

My findings — I looked at regular-season games since the 1970 merger — are at the bottom. These are the bullet points:

● Teams have won more often when they’ve given up 14 points (.814) than when the’ve given up 9 (.794). Likewise:

21 (.564) vs. 16 (.520)

28 (.316) vs. 23 (.299)

32 (.225) vs. 26 (.206)

39 (.115) vs. 34 (.110)

48 (.055) vs. 37 (.052)

There you have it, folks. Conclusive evidence that it’s not always in a club’s best interest to “Hold that line!”

● This is why the whole “when a team allows 17 points or less” business (or 21 points or whatever) is misleading. The “or less” skews it, because lower point totals have really high winning percentages. Consider:

17 points or less: .789 (8,606 games/6,761-1,787-58 W-L-T)

21 points or less: .719 (11,311/8,097-3,138-76)

But . . .  exactly 17 points = a .625 winning percentage (.164 lower than “17 points or less”) and exactly 21 points = .564 (.155 lower than “21 points or less”). Big differences.

● The highest point total that would still give you a 50-50 chance to win: 21 (.564). FYI: At 19 (.442) and 20 (.465) the odds are still against you.

A 1-in-3 chance: 25 (.351).

A 1-in-4 chance: 28 (.316).

A 1-in-5 chance: 32 (.225).

A 1-in-10 chance: 39 (.115).

● In some cases, you wonder whether what’s most important isn’t the points but the number of scores you allow. For instance, 16 points is probably four scores (a touchdown and three field goals), while 21 is probably three (touchdowns). Does that help explain why teams that give up 21 points win more often than those that give up 16? Do four scoring drives tend to consume more of the clock than three, giving the opponent less time of possession (and thus, less opportunity to score itself)?

Or how about this: Does allowing 21 points suggest the opposition might have missed a field goal try — since it’s rare a team doesn’t have at least one during a game? Missed field goal tries can cause major momentum swings, almost like turnovers. I’m just spitballing here. Heck, maybe it’s a quantitative thing: four scores amount to more “negative feedback” than three, regardless of their point value. Whatever the explanation, it’s fascinating. You wouldn’t think the reason would be sample size, because the total games aren’t dramatically different — 688 (16) vs. 899 (21).

You could raise the same questions for 28 (.316) and 23 (.299) — or: four TDs (usually) vs. two TDs and three field goals.

Anyway, it’s fun to speculate about. Maybe there’s a mathematical genius out there — or a psychiatrist — who can sort all this out for us. (I think I’ve already established I’m not that guy.)

The raw data, in case you’re interested:

Pts Win Pct Games W-L-T
0 1.000 447 447-0-0
2 1.000 7 7-0-0
3 .989 545 539-6-0
5 .923 13 12-1-0
6 .936 439 409-26-4
7 .962 879 844-31-4
8 .929 28 26-2-0
9 .794 286 227-59-0
10 .869 1,230 1,060-152-18
11 .818 33 27-6-0
12 .706 177 125-52-0
13 .720 1,065 762-293-10
14 .814 1,089 884-201-4
15 .580 150 87-63-0
16 .520 688 356-328-4
17 .625 1,530 947-567-14
18 .548 84 46-38-0
19 .442 394 174-220-0
20 .465 1,328 611-703-14
21 .564 899 505-390-4
22 .438 217 95-122-0
23 .299 810 239-565-6
24 .371 1,267 469-796-2
25 .351 114 40-74-0
26 .206 360 73-285-2
27 .241 990 238-750-2
28 .316 630 198-430-2
29 .179 156 28-128-0
30 .124 490 61-429-0
31 .185 831 153-676-2
32 .225 71 16-55-0
33 .124 194 24-170-0
34 .110 565 61-502-2
35 .133 309 40-267-2
36 .140 86 12-74-0
37 .052 251 13-238-0
38 .069 360 25-335-0
39 .115 26 3-23-0
40 .025 79 2-77-0
41 .060 199 12-187-0
42 .015 134 2-132-0
43 .000 29 0-29-0
44 .012 84 1-83-0
45 .016 124 2-122-0
46 .000 9 0-9-0
47 .040 25 1-24-0
48 .055 55 3-52-0
49 .000 37 0-37-0
50 .000 12 0-12-0

Source: pro-football-reference.com

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